My own personal story

Dear Friend,

I pray you have been blessed by the information you have received from reading stories and gaining encouragement from this website. You may be coming to this site in the midst of a long period of infertility, or you may just be at the beginning of your fertility treatments. My heart hurts with you. I have come to realize through the years that everyone’s fertility story is different. Some have never conceived; some have conceived through intervention or; like me, some have conceived naturally, but it just took time. God’s plan is different for each of us,it is a unique plan that God has given to us including the pain. He has given His best to each of us even though we may not agree at first.

My story began at the quick conception of our son, Caleb. I was eight months pregnant when I noticed that something was wrong. A few hours later, I was taken to have an ultrasound and was told our baby’s heart had stopped beating. The year following Caleb’s death was such an overwhelming difficult one. After a year of trying to conceive, God granted us our prayers and we were expecting our second son. I went into pre-term labor with Corey at 23 weeks and ended up on bed rest for 3 months. During this time, I learned SO MUCH about God and who He is. I learned that God is NOT out to get me or harm me, but that He was gracious, compassionate, and His mercies were new every morning just for me.

I delivered Corey at eight months, and we are so thankful to have a son. Two years later, we conceived again and that pregnancy ended the day after I found out I was pregnant. That was the beginning of my infertility journey. I never conceived again. Has it been hard? Yes, those were some of the most stressful and heart-wrenching times in our lives. It was very painful, but the bottom line was that we were in this together. We were infertile as a couple. Craig and I knew that despite our outcome that God had special plans for us, with or without more children.

We are tremendously thankful for the son we have, but I never wanted just one child. I lost a dream and the hope of having more children. You may say, “But you have one.” This is very true. Just remember, like I said at the beginning, each person’s story is different, unique only to themselves. It took a lot of time to come to a peaceful place in my life. It was only through God’s sovereign grace and knowing the Lord Jesus as my Savior that I have been able to have this peace. God wants the best for us and he does not promise us all roses or the things that WE think is best. The Bible says that His ways and thoughts are so much higher than ours. I do know He will guide, lead, and direct you through the valley. My prayer is that you will trust the Lord for His work and timing in your life. I pray God will use this in your marriage to draw you together in prayer and trusting God.

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With His love,